Sunday, September 17, 2017

Are We There Yet?

Remember as a kid and your parents put you in a car, said you were going to X, and it would be great once you got there? And you always wanted to be at the destination as fast as you could because you didn't want to go in the first place? Or you were tired of going somewhere you didn't know where you were going, or why? Remember how you bugged your parents with 'Are we there yet?' and when the answer was no, you'd whine and sigh and make life miserable for everyone involved?

As adults, we too often have that same destination focus. Except, as adults, it's a bit different.

We say things like:
'Once I get this house, I will be happy.'
'The minute I can get rid of X, everything will be ok.'
'Once Friday gets here, I can relax.'
'When my child becomes X, things will settle down.'

It's the same destination envy we had as children but morphed into adult terms. And we're still unhappy!

As adults, we've forgotten something very, very important.

But before I tell you what that is, let me try to explain it a different way and see if you can guess...

Remember as a kid and your parents told you that the family was going to Disneyworld on vacation?
Or to the beach?
Or to the mountains for skiing?
Or simply on a scavenger hunt and YOU held the map with secret clues?

Can you guess what it is yet?

Remember when you were a kid and the trip was so exciting you couldn't contain your joy?

As adults, we've forgotten what it felt like to have the journey be part of the joy.
We've been so pre-programmed to think deviation is devastation.

But it's not. Oh, it is so NOT devastation.
I remember I used to get upset when I'd take a wrong turn. A wrong turn is an obstacle, as I saw it. And we've all been taught an obstacle is a problem. A wrong turn meant unknown, unfamiliar streets, and trying to figure out on the fly how to get where I was going without turning around (Oh no! you can't go backwards! that's crazytalk!). So I would forge on, not knowing, and be upset that this mistake was adding time I didn't have to my trip, delaying me from getting to my destination.

Until one day I decided to embrace the suck. I decided to enjoy the wrong turns. Wrong turns were now obstacle illusions. I decided to look at the new world magically put in my path. I turned a wrong turn into part of my journey. And it turned out to be a joy. I was no longer irritated by wrong turns. I enjoyed them. I saw so many new things, beautiful things, scary things, weird things, fun things on those wrong turns, that they no longer angered me.

Life is like that.
Once you decide that how your life is, is how it is, and you enjoy, learn, and grow through the 'wrong' turns life throws at you, life ceases to be a huge struggle and and turns into something to be enjoyed, no matter where you are.
The reward is a bigger, richer, more rewarding life. Full of obstacle illusions, yes. But also full of magic, joy, fun, learning, and love.

The destination is the same for all of us. No, not death silly. Happiness. We all want to be happy.
So stop asking life, 'Are we there yet?' which takes happiness out of you, and instead take a deep breath, exhale slowly, and enjoy the journey. Because the journey IS life.

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Christmas is 15 Weeks Away!

15 weeks away, or 3.75 months from now...
15 Friday paychecks away. Or
8 bi-weekly paychecks or
7 twice-a-month paychecks away.

In other's CLOSE!

And just starting FT at my current job with my first FT paycheck in the middle of October....let's just say that it's a hand-made Christmas this year.

Because I must mail 90% of my presents.
Take them with me (a month early) when I visit for Thanksgiving.

Either butt better get in gear.

I have to put them in motion...

So, what are YOU doing for Christmas?

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

That's Not Family

People that hurt others, on purpose, emotionally or otherwise, are not family.

Monday, June 26, 2017

Dropping Off the Face of the Earth

Somewhere around the beginning of June, I dropped off the face of the earth.
Translation? I deleted my facebook account.

No, I didn't disable it.
I *deleted* it.
Meaning, I can't go back and pick up where I left off.

Why did I do that?
I needed to be away from all the drama and silly arguments and bashing (political or otherwise).
I needed to clear out all the useless and mundane statements, accusations and exclamations that abound in fb-land.

Too much negativity. There's enough of it in the world as it is, I didn't need to read it constantly on FB.

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Atticus Said...

"Let me die first or I will die twice."

That's basically how I feel about my husband, should he die before me.
Although he says I am not allowed to die first, that he must because he doesn't want to live without me.

I have found the one whom my soul loves...without a doubt, for better or wor...well, there is no worse. Ever. We don't fight.  We are in tune about 98% of the time. The other 2% we may not be in tune we are deeply respectful and give the other space and support (which we do all the time anyway, but for that 2% we are more so).

My husband's first marriage was not a happy one. However his divorce was not terrible.
My first marriage was hell. My divorce was akin to crossing the river styx in a dissolving boat with Captain Hook at the helm.

A friend of mine (she), my current husband (he), and myself (me) are all divorced. We joke about our ex's, as all divorcee's are wont to do....
She got stupid.
He got crazy.
I got evil.

Stupid...stupid is just hard to manage, not impossible. You're not sure if they're zigging or zagging. But overall, they have no real direction or plan to hurt you. It just happens occasionally.
Crazy...crazy is the easiest, if not the most frustrating. No matter what, you are guaranteed for them to do exactly what you don't want them to do if it will benefit you in any way...because if it benefits you, it's obviously not benefiting them (this applies even if it is mutually beneficial).
Evil...evil is the worst. Evil can pretend to be nice. Evil can stab you in the back while staring you in the face, and usually take glee in doing so. Evil doesn't care who they hurt, so long as it benefits them AND hurts you. Evil uses kids against the parent. Evil lies to your face, to the lawyer, and will pass the lie detector test doing so because evil *believes* they are telling the truth.

So when I say I love my husband...I *love* my husband. He is the opposite of my first husband. He is thoughtful, caring, polite, intelligent, smart, hard-working, loves the outdoors, and loves me deeply.

After living through the hell that was my first marriage, the reward is my current husband.

I cannot fathom should he die before me.  I know he feels the same of me.
That's why he says he gets to die first. And why I must go first.

But if he should die first, I will die twice.

Saturday, April 8, 2017

Smells of Heaven, and Chipotle Mayo

This morning I remarked to my husband, 'Can we just put chipotle, vanilla, coffee, and cinnamon randomly around the house? Maybe with a campfire background? Because I'm pretty sure that's what heaven smells like.'

Easy, Fresh, Chipotle Mayo

And the funny thing? I wasn't joking. You want me to immediately be at ease? put me in the mountains, surrounded by trees....or have some chipotle, vanilla, coffee, cinnamon or campfire where I can smell it and I just melt.

He and I both love those five smells. The husband would have to add whisky to his favorite smells...especially that liquid campfire smelling Laphroaig he loves so much.

Friday, March 31, 2017

Fabulous 4-Ingredient Whole30 Fajita Crackers

Now, I know 'Whole30' and 'crackers' do not usually go together in the same sentence. But if you've been reading this blog a while, you know I've made this cracker before.

Since that time, I have experimented greatly with this recipe...and well, it's pretty much perfect....except....

Friday, March 3, 2017

Childhood Chores, Choices, and Cash

The other day, a cousin of mine posted about a new game system her son desperately wanted. She was unsure for various reasons if she should allow him to have it.
She thought he should earn it, and rightly so. To which her son replied, but I already have the money in my savings!

So goes the quandary of parents, everywhere.
How do you teach children the value of money if you just buy them things?
How do you teach children the value of work if they can use their money any way or time they wish?
How do you teach children the skills to navigate through this messy, monetary world? And how do you teach those skills without 'adulting' your child?

Monday, February 27, 2017

Churning at the Price of Butter

You've seen it at your local grocers or in your weekly ad:
Butter on sale! Only $3.99 a pound! Down from $4.50...such a bargain!

Yeah...I may be old, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't that long ago butter was $2.00 a pound, then $2.50 and on sale for $1.99.

Ah, to dream...those days are long past, I'm afraid. My question is, will it ever return?

Sunday, February 26, 2017

The Prepping Economist

I hoard butter.
Seriously, I do.

At any given time, I have between 15-20 pounds of it in my freezer.
Cheese? Yeah, not as crazy but I still like to have around 5-10 lbs of it, frozen. Mozzarella, cheddar, Monteray Jack, etc. You just never know when the mood for a quesadilla or pizza will strike!

Sunday, February 19, 2017

My Family's World's Best Carrot Cake

When I was a wee lassie, I remember my mother making this incredible cake with the best frosting. I knew it had carrots in it, but couldn't figure out why it tasted so good. I hated carrots.
Of course, it was all the sugar. I loved sugar.
Not to mention the cream cheese. Oh, glorious cream cheese!

Saturday, February 18, 2017

Take Your Accolades...Fabulous Homemade Croutons

Croutons are just multi-purpose little pieces of fabulous. Being soup season, we go through croutons a lot. Who doesn't love a nice, hot, french onion soup with melty cheese and croutons? Or baked potato soup? Or pasta e fagioli? I could go on and on...

They real are not just for crowning your salad. Nope. They have multiple uses like:

Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Saving My Sanity

I'm one of those empaths. You know the kind....

The ones who always seem to want to help, even if they don't know how.
The ones that feel what others feel, and feel bad for them.
The ones that speak, but words get twisted and you end up looking like an idiot.
The ones that want to save the world, but from behind a curtain of anonymity.
The ones that are caught between a helpful heart, and a rational mind.

That's that biggie. Helpful heart, but a rational mind.
It's something I've struggled with my entire life.
(If you're keeping track, it's also the perfect victim profile for the narcissist and/or sociopath.)

I've struggled with being different my whole life. I see things, invisible connections, from people to

Sunday, January 29, 2017

Dislike the President? Which One?

The scenario playing out today in the news..... Oh how quickly people forget....or maybe they weren't paying attention because it was their guy in office at the time? Or maybe they quietly passed the legislation and kept it under the radar?

Either way, it's irritating to watch one side complain that the president is banning a certain religion because he hates them, or because they are countries that his former business doesn't have dealings with or maybe it's because those countries don't like the color blue? Who the hell knows.
And it's irritating to watch the second side complain about the first side's bitching.

But the truth of the matter is that the list of countries were not the current president's list. And the law for them was signed in January of 2015 to take effect January 21, 2016.

Boston Eclair Cake Goodness

First, let me say this is NOT my recipe.  It comes from here.
But it is a fabulous recipe! OHMYGIDDYAUNT is this delicious.
But I warn you....more than one piece and you might go into diabetic coma.

And easy? Did I mention this was easy? Yes, it is...a tad time really need about an hour, plus time to refrigerate...about an hour and a half total. Not long in the grand scheme of things.

But it's still easy!

If you want a breathtaking dessert to bring to a potluck, or to wow your boss when you have her over for dinner? This is it. Trust me.

Monday, January 16, 2017

I Am Only One

It occurred to me...that people only see things one sided. Their side.
But there is so much more to life, to vision, to this big, big, world in which we live.

There are more than two sides to everything.
Top and bottom. Yes. But there's also left and right.
Black and white. Yes. But there's also gray.
Up and down. Yes. But there's also sideways.
Water can be hot, cold, frozen, wet, dry, vapor gas, or steam.
One way isn't the only way.

Friday, January 13, 2017

Of Emails, Scandals, and Justice Part II

...and so it goes, that any law abiding citizen shall be deemed plebeian and named 'pissant' for the governmental ruling class has ordered themselves above the laws they enact.

It seems that while us commoners lay quietly sleeping, the governmental ruling oligarchy changed the Rules of the House. Where it once said:

It shall now be amended with the following wording (approved on Jan 3, 2017) as such:

  (j) Member Records.-- In clause 6 of rule VII--
    (1) redesignate paragraphs (a) and (b) as subparagraphs (1) and (2):
    (3) in paragraph (a) (as so designated), insert '' as (2) designate the existing sentence as paragraph (a); and described in paragraph (b) ' ' after  '' Resident Commissioner ' ';
    (4) add at the end of the following new paragraph:
     Commissioner in the performance of official duties are ''
(b) Records   created, generated, or received by the congressional office of a Member, Delegate, or the Resident Delegate, or Resident Commissioner has control over such exclusively the personal property of the individual Member, Delegate, or the Resident Commissioner and such Member, records. ' ' .  

Did you catch that? The rules have just changed. It means that from now on any official record (paper, email, note, or correspondence) of any kind and in any form are the sole property of the congressional member, individually.

You're probably thinking, "so what?" right? I'm not a lawyer, obviously, but here's where I see the problem...

I'm going to assume that everyone is familiar with 'pleading the Fifth' where an individual can invoke the Fifth amendment to not say anything because in doing so, it would incriminate him or herself.
Well, there is a similar rule regarding documents. It's called the Act of Production. It does not apply in all cases, just certain cases where an individual is most likely guilty. (emphasis and wording is mine)

To receive protection under the "Act of Production" doctrine, a person's very act of producing the documents (Hiibel vs Sixth Judicial Dist. Ct., 124 S. Ct. 2451, 2460 (2004)) must have all three components: be (1) compelled, (2) testimonial, and (3) incriminating.

It's not enough to just say, 'Hey, no. I'm not going to produce them because I fear incrimination.'
No, the documents themselves must "furnish a link in the chain of evidence needed to prosecute him/her."

In other words, if the very documents requested can be used to prosecute you, then well, just invoke the Act of Production doctrine. Yay. Prosecutors must find another way to nail you to the wall.

And Congress has now made it so that any member's documents/records (created, generated, or received) by their office,  are now the sole property of that individual.
Individual. Not Office.

This means that those documents no longer fall under the Freedom of Information Act for they belong to the individual member (yay for personal privacy exemptions!), not the office, agency, or department. Federal agencies are required to disclose any information requested under the FOIA unless it falls under one of the nine exemptions which protect interests such as personal privacy, national security, and law enforcement. Remember that a request for a document which does not qualify as an "agency record" may be denied because only agency records are available under the FOIA.

Protection is available only to individuals, and only covers the testimonial aspect of the production itself, not the contents of the documents.
And congress just made all documents (records) created, generated, or received the personal property of the individual.
It means that a congressional member can now invoke the Act of Production.

How's that for a clear and transparent government?

Monday, January 9, 2017

Of Emails and Scandals and Justice

…US Intelligence Community (USIC) agencies determined that 81 e-mail chains, which FBI investigation determined were transmitted and stored on Clinton’s UNCLASSIFIED personal server systems, contained classified information ranging from the CONFIDENTIAL to TOP SECRET/SPECIAL ACCESS PROGRAM levels at the time they were sent between 2009-2013. The USIC determined that 68 of these e-mail chains remain classified.  In addition, the classification determination process administered by the US Department of State (State)….identified approximately 2,000 additional e-mails currently classified as CONFIDENTIAL and 1 e-mail currently classified as SECRET…..were transmitted and stored on at least two of Clinton’s personal server systems.
*bold and italicized emphasis is mine.

 This is big, people. HUGE. Not only has the former Secretary of State sent and received security classified e-mails on an unclassified personal server, but the very department for which she was responsible has a

Sunday, January 8, 2017

Healthy Cooking

I've been a registered user of Mealime for a few months. Let me tell you, I love this site.  You can choose the number of meals/recipes you want to cook in a week, as well as narrowing down the types of meals you want.

Vegetarian? No problem.
Classic meat-based meals? Got it.
Lots of fish? Swim on down.
Paleo? Bring it on!

You can specify your allergies and restrictions, the number of persons eating, and the can tell them the foods you DON'T like.

You get a picture of the finished product, an interactive grocery list where you can check off items you already have, and a recipe guide.

And you get this all for free!

You can join for $6 a month ($4 if you pay $50 at once for the year), and you get even more benefits like calorie and nutritional information, build meal plans from your favorite recipes, etc.

Here's a sample, simple meal of chicken and carrots:

You should try it. You've got nothing to lose, and if you DO like it, join!

(and no, I am not being paid to advertise Mealime. I just love it!)

Friday, January 6, 2017

Southern Ice and Northern Fire

Like most people, it's fun to laugh at southern drivers in inclement weather. It's like watching a toddler who just learned how to walk try to run, not understanding why he's suddenly face-down on the floor.

I live in the north. Today, it happens to be a temperature of -1 and the windchill is -15 (which is technically the temperature that matters because that's what you FEEL when you are outside). We haven't had snow in a month. That's unusual. Winters here are normally more snowy than this season has been. When we do get snow, it's 3 or 4 inches two or three times a week, or 7-12 inches all at once.

And you know what? This southern California-raised girl loves it. I love snow. Always have. And now that I live in the north, I want more snow.

The north has snow removal down to an art. It's awesome. Get 10" on Sunday night, main roads are plowed and you still have to go to work on Monday morning. It is just how it is. If it weren't this way, the northern states would close from Thanksgiving to the Spring equinox. But,

Thursday, January 5, 2017

Why You Should Stop Copy & Pasting Posts on Facebook

Why you should 'share' the post, and stop copy & pasting posts:

Many viral hoaxes explicitly tell you NOT to share the message, but specifically instruct you to copy and paste it to your status.

The answer is that by copying and pasting a message, you are creating another instance of the message that is not dependant on the original.

So, for example, if 5000 people share a message by clicking Share, and for some reason that original message was removed (for example, deleted by Facebook for being fake!) then all those 5000 “shares” will vanish, at the click of a mouse. To surmise, if the original post being shared is removed, so does all of its shares.

The same doesn’t apply if you copy and paste a message, then post it. If 5000 people copy and paste a message to their own timeline, and the original gets removed, you still have 4999 instances of the message remaining on Facebook, since they are all separate posts, independent of each other.

Do everyone a favor- help cut down on spam, hoaxes, fake news, etc simply by SHARING the post, instead of copy/paste - that way, when a post is marked/reported as spam/hoax/etc and gets deleted, they ALL get deleted.

Info courtesy of: